Yes = No.
                                 No = Yes
                                Maybe = No.
                             We need = I want.
                       I'm sorry = You'll be sorry.
                   We need to talk = I need to complain.
                   Sure, go ahead = I don't want you to.
                 Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.
               Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.
              I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
            Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you're dead.
          You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.
         Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs.
        You're so ... manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.
        Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.
    It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.
   You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.
  How much do you love me? = I did something today that you're really not
                              going to like.

                               When MEN Say:

                         I'm hungry = I'm hungry.
                         I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy.
                          I'm tired = I'm tired.
                        Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
                     I love you = Let's have sex now.
                   I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?
            What's wrong? = I guess sex is out of the question.
          May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.
         Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.
      Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.
      Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.
  Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys.
  You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to have sex with you
                       within the next ten minutes.
Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person
                  and then I'd like to have sex with you.
          I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay